Chapter 2: Keep Dreaming
I wait for a moment to collect myself before I face my crew. I wipe away my tears, swallow my despair, and take a few deep breaths. I shut my eyes and count down from five. Five—I will save my crew —four—we will find a way out of this— three— I will overcome my weakness —two—we still have time—one—I must be strong. I exit my chambers and see my crew forcing themselves to sleep in their pods. Their withered faces and sunken eyes meet my own. Even though everyone is sleeping more as an escape from our ever present demise, they’ve never looked more exhausted. My gaze sinks down as I muster up the words I believe they want to hear, “We need to keep thinking of a solution. It’s still too soon to give up.”
I’m answered with silence, they all can see through my empty words. These two months have taken its toll on us all. The Voice crackled in my ear, “Death beckons; breadth wasted on dead men.”
I shake my head in an attempt to dislodge the ashen voice and address my crew once again, “Maybe you all didn’t hear me,” I say voice booming, “We have mourned our deaths for long enough. Now is the time we think of only survival. I refuse to simply wait for a gruesome death only for my final moments to be: if only we tried that or maybe if we thought of this.” We will keep trying until either we die with no regrets or live passed the impossible. I plan on saving each and every one of you, and you all should feel the same.”
This time rather than silence I’m greeted by a slow clap by one, extremely sarcastic, crew member. Their name escapes me. “Thank you captain for that rousing speech,” they said, “Let me just remind you, and anyone else that may have forgotten, that our final stop is where light goes to die. Oh, and tell me if I’m understanding you right captain, you’re saying that if we just put our heads together—for the millionth time—and try really, really, really hard then we can perform a miracle?”
I replied with more hope than certainty, “Yes, but we must try a bit harder than that.” A sudden snort from one crew member sent a wave of laughter throughout the room. In an instant the somber atmosphere that weighed heavily upon us suddenly parted like clouds, and revealed everyone’s bright smiles. Even my sarcastic crew member couldn’t help but laugh.
“Well then captain,” they said, pausing a moment for the laughter to die down, “Where do we start?”
My smile diminished and quickly replaced by a stoic expression, “We already considered everything reasonable, now we must turn to the unreasonable.”