Willing Participant

Give us a call,

with a heart of plight.

I’ll sing siren songs,

of sinister delights.

I won’t make them right.

They’ll burrow deep,

like acid down your bloodline.

You’re in my black lab,

head strapped back.

Your hands, freely by your side.

Creative Self-DestructioN

Incessant thoughts

pour regretful memories

They’re thick and rich

like an oil painting

Streaks of red

my boiling blood

Waves of death

a pitch black flood

They bleed into me

and fuel my artistry

It goes on endlessly

this ruthless alchemy

My Monsters Don’t Speak

My Monsters don’t speak, but they have hands and feet.

They squeeze at the back of my eyes, like pressure building in a volcanic mind.

Back of my neck, cold and wet, marked by blood and flesh turned red.

They’re banging at the door, desperate to get to me.

They’re not in a shadow or behind some tree, they’re living inside of me.

My monsters don’t have to speak, I already know they sound like me.

Dissociate

Like zip ties on the mind

a high pressure valve shut tight.

A deep cut that doesn’t bleed,

or being trapped in a dream.

So light headed,

I’m flying high,

while leaving my body behind.

To this day I don’t know if it was a fear or hate.

I just remember, at the time, I felt almost great.

Like all the pain biting down on me, lost its teeth.

But it was my teeth that were ripped away.

Next time I’ll embrace my pain.

I’ll defend myself, and not run away.

Diagnosed

I hate that you think you know me

put words to own me

My mind can’t be chained by your prognosis

treated by a diagnosis

You think my problem is self-loathing?

or maybe feeling lonely?

You fear this pain I’m holding.

Can’t see this poison is being distilled

into something more deserving.

I bear this pain

and turn it into paint

like so many before me.

Too Much to Ask For

Ask for ambition, but afraid of the fire?

To gain recognition, then stand by the pyre.

This is a test, not fit for liars.

Desire,

Ignite the soul

Set it ablaze

Keep only the gold, safe from the flames.

Hunger,

Take the core

Leave only a want for more.

Strength,

Cut all restraints

Watch as Nature gravitates to ill or just rewards.

Ambition gets you what you crave, but it also takes away.

Turn Around

There’s a lie we live by

Don’t turn around. . .

Like a warning, it grips us

It’s eyeing you now. . .

Can’t help but fall victim

Don’t make a sound. . .

Like our world is crashing down

It has it’s hands on you now. . .

That’s why they call us brave

Why’d you turn around? . .